I continue to lose my shit at the most random times. They say it takes a year for the random shit-losing in relation to the death of a loved one to subside. That gives me seven months to the day. I break down because I remember, really, and I never, ever want to forget, so maybe that means I want to continue losing my shit indefinitely. Or maybe people gain better control of their emotions once acceptance kicks in. How’s that for a concept? I can’t stop looking at pictures of the old man and all the happy times. I wish we’d known then to treasure them more.

It sounds like we’ll be burying Fahj’s ashes next month. John is coming up for it. He’s doing sort of okay, I guess. He has tumors between his stomach and liver, but none on his organs. It’s been that way for a couple of months. He and Martine are going to drive up and stop to visit folks along the way. I’m headed up to Tower with Angie over Memorial Day weekend so we can go out with Mike and find a nice spot for Pa’s big sleep. It bothers me thinking about burying him. The hell if I know why; I guess it’s the finality.

Angie and I are headed to Seattle on the 27th - only 16 days now! We realized we couldn’t make it a year without our sisters’ trip so I’m paying her way until her wedding is paid off. I’d hate to have to travel alone.

Abby and I went up to Duluth, then Grand Superior Lodge a couple of weekends ago. The smoking room at the Holiday Inn in Duluth and the free room at GSL were like night and day. It was a super chill weekend, but a lot of fun. We went out in Duluth Friday night and Ryan, who we met on our last trip north, tried to make Abby his girlfriend, so that was entertaining. A bar patron also detailed the differences between acid and meth for me. And I made my very first trip to Betty’s Pies. It only took twenty-five years. And to think I call myself a northerner!

Sabine and I scored what seem to be front row tickets for the American Idol concert on September 1. Adam and Kris and Danny - oh my! I imagine it will be eighty-five smacks well spent. It’s time to really test that zoom lens Darren bought me.

Speaking of Darren, he broke off our friendship a couple of weeks ago. Needless to say I’m hardly crushed about it. How DARE I move on from our relationship? We’re only going on eight months since the breakup and all…

I bet it’s been long enough since I’ve updated that I didn’t mention the killer front-row/third-row tickets I got from USC for the NCAA basketball tournament. Abby, who is apparently my boyfriend, and I watched the KU/Dayton game and then USC/Michigan State. It was a lot of fun, even for a girl who doesn’t like basketball. Probably because my blind ass could actually see what was going on. Or maybe because we filled Diet Sunkist cans with Bud Light Lime for the walk over. One can’t be sure.

In other wonderful news, we lost the Bears for this year. Pardon my lack of team-player attitude. They were what kept me in the Cities over Thanksgiving weekend last year. You know, so I missed the final holiday my dad was alive for. I will not miss them and I most certainly will not miss staying at the hotel for an entire weekend.

Until next time… (which may as well be “until next year…”)