Today has been one of those days. You know the kind. The ones where bit by bit you are reminded of things you did or said the night before but had temporarily blocked out. Thanks, alcohol! For example, Darren and I were just watching a movie and someone said, "Wow, you really took a shot." And then I realized...I took a shot last night! The nice girl in pink with the tongue ring bought it for me. Just one, but hard alcohol and staying at my workplace? I was just asking for it.

Yesterday I loaded up my backpack with 24 cans of beer, hopped on the bus, and made my way downtown. It only seemed fitting to have a backpack full of beer to go hang out with my college friends. It was Goldfine all over again. Angie and Aurora and Kelly and, duh, Brian all came to the cities to celebrate Brian's 24th birthday, which is today. Today is also Javy Lopez's birthday. November 5th has brought this world some good men.

Let me tell you about the parts of last night that I remember, shall I? Okay!

Aurora and Angie were the first to arrive to the hotel. I felt sort of bad drinking alone and the Bible had already come out of the drawer, so thank goodness I wasn't alone long. Shortly after Aurora and Angie arrived, Kelly and Brian joined us, and there were cheers all around. We drank in the room until our blood was adequately saturated, then we decided to go visit our missing member at work. Poor Alexis. Not only did she have the Worst Week Ever, she had to put up with five tipsy, squealy friends at her BOOK STORE, where silence is typically appreciated. I'm not sure how long we were there, but I ended up leaving with five books. I also recall, and have photographic reminders of, feigning masturbation in the religion section. It was quite wonderful to see Alexis, as it was the rest of the gang, and I think we had at least four drinks each in tribute to our dear, sweet absent friend.

Wait a minute. Before I go on, let's discuss wardrobe. Aurora brought khaki back, a la Steve Irwin, thanks to the clearance rack at Target. We were all a little distraught when we spotted another female wearing the same shirt. We should have kicked her ass. Kelly worked the layers like a fashion goddess. Seriously, why is this girl not on a runway somewhere? Brian took his pants off for us a little bit (whose birthday was it, anyway?), but also found a pair of sunnies in Aurora's car that complimented his ensemble perfectly. Angie wore her cute new coat, which I don't think she took off the entire evening. Even when we danced for a long, long time. I know she had a boob shirt on undernearth it, but with a face like that, who needs to show off her (admitably fabulous) chest? Speaking of chests, I wonder how many tits that guy on the dance floor groped last night.

Anyway, where was I? Ah yes. We left Alexis and tried to find Woody's, which she recommended. We cruised around some parking ramps which felt a lot like playing chicken and we couldn't find Woody's so Kelly wasn't able to pick up the guy in the Mustang. We grew worried about our fading buzzes and quickly made our way back downtown. Now I'm not sure how this happened, but there's something about Brian and a cousin and this bar and so many free drinks. FREE. No charge. Well, Angie did buy two, for $4 each. Somehow it only cost her a dollar though. She might have had her coat off for that order.

This is where I have less to write about because I don't quite remember. I know there was lots and lots of dancing and recruiting men to dance with Kelly and Angie, and maybe Aurora too. Hell if I remember. Apparently we called Kelly's brother Wade/Wayne and then I cracked up her phone. I don't know what I had to say to Wadyne and I really don't want to. Kelly, let me know what I owe you for repairs. The phone I mean, because the therapy sessions your brother might need after that message are most likely out of my budget. Everyone else, don't allow me around phones after I've had anything over eleven drinks.

When we came back, we were denied access to our room by the doors I assume our stoner neighbors closed. Honestly, who throws a shoe? Talk about confusion.

In closing, my sister-in-law shot a deer last night - a nice, big doe. I asked my mom if she was able to cut out the asshole because we had been discussing this challenge earlier in the day, and my mom responded, "I don't think she had to. It was a doe." There you have it. Lady deer don't poop.

Brian, thanks for being born. Can we celebrate your birthday again next week?